the time of singing has come!

I am not very pleased with the state my family is in. At times, I feel discouraged by their values and conduct. Even disgusted. I wonder, seriously wonder if they can be saved. If God even meant for them to be saved.

It doesn't matter if they aren't believers. At least, let them be a normal, typical family. I wonder why God puts me in such a family. Throughout my growing up years, I had only one wish - to have a "normal" happy family.

But then, what is "normal"? I guess every family is different. Every family has its own problems. But I feel that the problems of my family have gotten to the point of no return...

I envy the happy families I see in church. They are so closely-knitted to each other. Each member of the family knows his or her own role to play and they do their part. I do love my family, but it's just so sad at the same time.

I know there must be a reason for everything. I know there must be a reason why my family is almost to the point of dysfunctional. I know there must be a reason why I experienced various traumas. Each of these shaped me to be the person I am today. Without them, I would be a totally different girl altogether.