the time of singing has come!

Why do I feel so alone?


The word is independence, girl.

Labels: one of those days

Somehow I feel that this is the path that I have chosen, and so I must continue to walk on in it. Not that it is no good, yes, it isn't my ideal, but it can be really good... And it had been good.

Labels: counting grace

I have lost count of the number of times we quarreled. But the number doesn't matter. What matters is that I learn to affirm you with words, and in deeds. Every guy likes to feel important and powerful. Even the toughest guy need some loving words and a little loving touch.

I am still learning.
And my own issue? I need to work on my own daily bible reading.

Labels: love story

Had such a productive work day today!!

Morning
I had barely finished my breakfast at my workstation and barely chitchat before my student came down unexpectedly to look for me.
- Counselling session
- recess duties
- case notes and paper work for last supervision
Afternoon
I didn't go out for lunch and only gobbled down my chicken rice over my desk work at 2+ pm.
- ukulele lesson
- ukulele delivery and claims/reimbursement
- more paper work for last supervision
- last supervision!

I didn't even remember to put on my ear studs which I had thrown into my bag this morning at home (puts on now..)

Off I go for my first anniversary date!
A girl deserves to enjoy herself after a hard day's work (and after one year of heart-work)! <3 br="br">

Labels: counting grace, special days

我不配得到幸福，不可能真的快乐。

The reason for the recent fb post above was due to a change in mood just after I blogged about how blissful i am.

How ironic? Hence I was just thinking that perhaps I am meant to be emo, not happy. Perhaps introverts are emo creatures, not happy creatures. Perhaps all things blissful aren't real and passes like vapor.

Anyway, this isn't going to be another emotional or impulsive post. Just a lingering thought as I ponder about God's will for me..

Labels: contemplation, one of those days

There is no point dressing up and looking beautifully when all it ends up is quarrel. No need to have dressed up today. What a joke! I could have then attended morning service, have fellowship, and none of these petty quarrels would have happened. Ironic... Maybe this teaches me what priority to place in life. Not the outward, but what's inside.

Labels: one of those days

It's kinda strange as I think back about how "emo" was used to describe most of me and yet when I think about now, I just think that I am happy.

As I think about my life now, I can't resist a smile and know how blessed I am. I have a job that I love. I have a loving husband-to-be. My loved ones are generally all still with me. I have a God who loves me and blesses me.

As memories of the years passed suddenly sweep over me, I realised that such bliss isn't random or by chance, especially as I recalled how emo I used to be. Where is the emo me?

It isn't by chance that I have all I have today. And I am not about to say that I have earned all these by my efforts neither. But I know that through the training that I had in God, He had taught me to wait on Him. And while it was indeed painful during the period of waiting, He who had promised is faithful. Indeed He is!

I mustn't take what I have now for granted. I mustn't think that it was by chance. But that by the grace of God, He has already prepared all these for me. At the right time, He would give me. Why would a father withhold good things from his child?

He who seeks the Lord will lack no good things.

Remember the journey that you have taken with God and how you have waited on the Lord. It wasn't an easy one and don't be mistaken, it isn't going to be easier henceforth. So don't ever give up. Continue to trust in the Lord to provide. He knoweth best.

Labels: contemplation

In the middle of the night... I don't know what I'm searching for by reading stuffs after stuffs online. I seemed to be seeking for something to feed my heart so that I may be nicely tucked in. What is it?

In the middle of the night... When everything and everyone else seemed to be soundly asleep. When the world seemed to be sleeping too... I wonder how we have got to here. How in history have we got to where we are right now, this moment? What have contributed to me being here this time?

Memories of the past flood my mind like waves gushing in. Fond ones, funny ones, bittersweet ones.. Every step of the way, however we had walked, whatever we had done, whatever we have said, they have all led me to where I am now. Is it with fondness I recall and look upon what I have now, or is it with regrets? Is there anything I could have done better? Did I hurt anyone? Am I still hurt?

It's amazing how things change so fast and how fast this world is moving on. I used to blog on my laptop but now I blog on my phone while lying in bed. Life never wait for you hur? You got to make sure you don't get yourself stuck.

Life is amazing. And it's amazing that God gives us this wonderful gift of life. We get to see, smell, taste, hear, and feel things beautiful. This beautiful life that God gave to us, are we making it beautiful? Or have we tainted it with the ugly things? Have we polluted it with envy, jealousy, pride?

We can be so beautiful. Why have we made ourselves ugly?

I ought to and am cherishing the beautiful life that God is giving me now.

Labels: contemplation