the time of singing has come!

I still enjoy writing very much.

Seeing words string together to form sentences, and seeing sentences coming together to form paragraphs, and paragraphs structured into a coherent message. Almost exhilarating! Even exciting when you know that you can be a pen for God and you are simply writing what He wants you to write.

Only say words that make souls stronger - Ann Voskamp & Holley Gerth

It has been a while since I really write words that can make souls stronger. It isn't that God has not been inspiring me. Occasionally, I do feel His prompting, like a tug at my heart, telling me about something. But my excuse is that I am busy... too tired sometimes to write. As time passes, these inspirations also vanish with the wind and I am left a hollow shell.

It's strange, because when I don't write, I find that eventually I become empty. Without substance. Without meaning. Maybe for a while, I wouldn't. Afterall, life is getting busier and in a way, more exciting for me. But, eventually.... I feel empty.

I wish to be renewed in my writing. If God wills, I still hope to be a writer for Him. I humbly seek to be inspired by Him, and let my words point people to the Author of life, and be impacted by His Word.

I must keep writing. :)

Labels: contemplation

My lovely ladies cheered my otherwise gloomy day up by ending my day with laughter, chats, advice, "warnings"!

We shared and updated each other what's current and also talked about our future plans. Two are settling down, busy with wedding plans and marrying into the in-laws first. One seemed likely to be settling down once she get the almost-impossible balloting chance. One seemed possible that she would be heading for further studies overseas.

It's just amazing that we could share without fear of being judged because we know who we are. We might still not be very happy with each other sometimes but we also love each other in a way. It's just strangely comfortable, strangely amazing :) I love these girls.

Labels: counting grace, one thousand gifts, special days

What is the extent you can go for a girl who is trying to "sniff" away her stress? She feels unloved, unwanted, without care, without help. What can I do for her? How can she break free from this?

Labels: one of those days

Am I strong or am I actually weak?

Today I locked myself in my room and cried. I really felt sick from all the travelling to and fro, busy over my student's case. My body aches and my head is also painful. My brain is literally shutting down but I have to force it on. A very uncomfortable situation to be in for a extended period of time.

Plus, I really want my student's case to be done and dealt with too. It has been bugging me.

Then I feel so weak from trying to be so strong that I broke down in my room and just sobbed. And I wanted to rest my headache and nausea away.

I messaged my dear one but because he didn't have his iPad, he couldn't know. And sometimes I just feel like this is my life - I have to be strong by myself at my weakest. Nobody can help me.

Only God can sustain me and I prayed.

But in times like these, a loving touch would have been nice.

Labels: one of those days, rant

I always thought the father was nonchalant, that he probably beats up his wife and couldn't care less about his children. When I called him up again to ask him to come down to school because of something really serious and he asked what is it regarding, I had thought that he is fed up. But then when he said he will try to ask and I heard in the background how he asked his supervisor humbly in broken English, I could then sense his love for his girl.

Labels: counting graces

Hearing what happened to my girl reminded me of what happened years ago.... That kind of fear, who can understand unless you have been there? Yes, "no need to be afraid", "you got to be strong and stand up against these kind of people", but the learned helplessness, can you really understand?

Labels: one of those days

It's hard to be an introvert with a lot of empathy.

Labels: one of those days