the time of singing has come!

I write to make myself feel better.

Because in words, letters mixed and matched to form words, I feel safe. I can make sense of what's going on within my head. I can motivate myself, correct myself, comfort myself, as though another being is doing it. I can be me, while I be the other. So when I am weak, I can indulge in being me. When I am strong, I can be the other.

It's not as complicated as it sounds..... I am just trying to create some confusion.. so that you can understand what's going on within my head right now.

The truth is, I'm not sure. My head feels empty. I feel happy.

Or is it my head feels happy, but I feel empty?

Haahs.

Is this trusting in Him? Because I just live from day to day and I try not to even think about tomorrow. I just take the day as it comes, as it is, and do my best. And at the end of the day, I pamper myself, I relax, I go to bed.

It's not that I have nothing to look forward to. I am definitely waiting for Jesus' coming again. And in the next few months, there are exciting (?) new changes awaiting me. But in the here and now? I'm not sure...

Something seems wrong hey? I probably have to spend more time with God. That's probably it.

Labels: random