falling sick...
i think im falling sick... not enough water i think. my hostel room is experiencing like shortage of water. drought man. i need water!!! anyone, please send me water as gifts!! lol. i also lacking sleep..... lacking quality sleep to be exact.
hai.. my stats test 2 was just over... well, at least i went for it.. i was experiencing helplessness and hopelessness when i was making my way to the lt. i didnt feel like going but i know i have to... ok what triggered everything was perhaps my sis.. i know she is also having a hard time.. but i always feel that she is unkind to me, her blood sister. she always make sure she dun stand at the losing end. thats how i feel..
whereas i feel that im always giving in. when she ask me to share the hostel room with her, i didnt mind much. ok, maybe i was thinking of trying hostel life myself in the first place. but i was also thinking of it as a favour to her. since one person stay is too expensive, i thought i just help her out a little..
then since we are both staying together alr, shldnt we work to make this a good experience? i know it isnt fair that i have been holding on to the key this few days... but it was the best way so that both can benefit mah. hai.. i feel that she's always only looking out for herself. self-centred way of life? she's also more friends-oriented than family-oriented.. hai whereas for me, i feel sad that my family might be disintegrating minute by minute..
my sis just told me that if i want to back out frm hostel, its fine with her and that its better this way. hai. ok, i was murmuring abt why did i even agree to share in the first place while i went out for the test.. i was feeling that i dun even have support from my sis. im alr feeling sad over my stats yet she was unfeeling and didnt want give me the key. so, she sms me that msg and i said 'i'll think abt it' i also didnt want to lose. i didnt want to appear vulnerable i guess. humans are all like that. hai. so how? shld i really back out from it?
i sure hope we forget abt it like later... sigh. i mean siblings always argue and have conflicts one mah. and the next day everything is forgotten. i hope this is no exception.
anyway, im back in the room. better go catch a wink or two.. today's my mom's birthday! i hope we get to celebrate as a family. go dinner or something...
hai.. my stats test 2 was just over... well, at least i went for it.. i was experiencing helplessness and hopelessness when i was making my way to the lt. i didnt feel like going but i know i have to... ok what triggered everything was perhaps my sis.. i know she is also having a hard time.. but i always feel that she is unkind to me, her blood sister. she always make sure she dun stand at the losing end. thats how i feel..
whereas i feel that im always giving in. when she ask me to share the hostel room with her, i didnt mind much. ok, maybe i was thinking of trying hostel life myself in the first place. but i was also thinking of it as a favour to her. since one person stay is too expensive, i thought i just help her out a little..
then since we are both staying together alr, shldnt we work to make this a good experience? i know it isnt fair that i have been holding on to the key this few days... but it was the best way so that both can benefit mah. hai.. i feel that she's always only looking out for herself. self-centred way of life? she's also more friends-oriented than family-oriented.. hai whereas for me, i feel sad that my family might be disintegrating minute by minute..
my sis just told me that if i want to back out frm hostel, its fine with her and that its better this way. hai. ok, i was murmuring abt why did i even agree to share in the first place while i went out for the test.. i was feeling that i dun even have support from my sis. im alr feeling sad over my stats yet she was unfeeling and didnt want give me the key. so, she sms me that msg and i said 'i'll think abt it' i also didnt want to lose. i didnt want to appear vulnerable i guess. humans are all like that. hai. so how? shld i really back out from it?
i sure hope we forget abt it like later... sigh. i mean siblings always argue and have conflicts one mah. and the next day everything is forgotten. i hope this is no exception.
anyway, im back in the room. better go catch a wink or two.. today's my mom's birthday! i hope we get to celebrate as a family. go dinner or something...
hope that you've recovered from your fever already :)
keep well.
Posted by
Anonymous |
11:42 PM